I am now 56 and instead of age dulling my senses, aging has heightened them to the point where what was once irritating and uncomfortable became intolerable.

An “unpleasant” smell has become something that makes me “run for cover”…my nose that is!  I have to block the scent completely or I will gag and throw up.

All “unpleasant” sounds have become amplified so that I often feel like I have spent too much time next to the speakers at a rock concert where the sound reverberates throughout my body, making me nauseous.  I have noticed that the sounds of nature do NOT adversely affect me, no matter how loud i.e. pounding surf against the shore, symphony of birds in the early morning hours…it is only man-made sounds that affect me adversely.  Oh, and the woman with the high pitch voice makes me cringe as the sound travels up and down my spine:)  Sweet as she is, I cannot listen to her speak for more than a minute or two:(

Every crowded event or situation that once stimulated me like a drug now makes me cringe and feel unsafe.

Even the former “stimulation to distraction” trip to a store, convention or street fair/carnival/circus that set me into a swoon of pleasurable looking now only provides me with that feeling of “too much to see” making me dart here and there randomly looking at the next bright shiny colourful thing that catches my eye.  I am quickly overcome with a bone deep fatigue, barely able to remain upright on my shaky legs.

And last but not least that sensitivity to touch varies to such a degree there are days that I don’t know where to throw myself…sometimes loose, soft and comfortable is mandatory…others times the hug of tight Lycra clothes are needed.

Scary to think what the next phase of my life will bring.

I remain hopeful that I will find most things more tolerable…somewhere in the middle of these first two phases of my life.

My only means of defence has been avoidance this past year and a half.

I virtually have become a prisoner in my own home.