Au naturel

I have forgotten what it is like being me, without medications.  Not so strange really, since I forget SO much.

Weird Tales #1, edited by Lin Carter, Zebra Bo...

Weird Tales #1, edited by Lin Carter, Zebra Books, 1980, cover art by Tom Barber. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
















I was chatting online yesterday with someone I play online games with.  She started reading my blog and gave me a compliment on my writing.  I was touched to the point of being teary eyed.

Yes, I realize it was somewhat overreacting to a compliment that was possibly just an offhand comment.  But that was always the case with me.  I’m not used to compliments, especially not when it concerns something I truly care about.

A Sensitive Plant in Bloom at Hirt's Gardens

A Sensitive Plant in Bloom at Hirt's Gardens (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Oversensitive is what I’ve been called and known as throughout my life.  The difference now is I accept it, will no longer fight it, squelch it or deny it and pretend I’m not touched by others’ words.  I am.  Touched.  In many ways:)





Another thing I had forgotten was how easily I forget stuff.  We had also chatted about American Idol, with me saying I was not surprised Holly got voted off.  She was confused, wondered what I was talking about and reminded me it was Colton that was voted off.  I laughed myself silly with that one.  Once she reminded me I totally remembered being surprised that the young girls hadn’t voted often enough to keep Colton in the game.  It was mostly wishful thinking on my part when I referred to Holly being gone.  I had replaced what I felt should have happened to what had actually happened.  How bizarre is that? Not so bizarre when you realize I’ve been like this my whole life.  That’s what friends are for, to remind me that I’m remembering the facts incorrectly:)

American Idol

American Idol (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Then, I went to bed at 11PM or so because I was tired.  I tossed and turned for an hour.  Took my pillow and headed to the couch so I wouldn’t keep hubby awake, push him off the bed or knock him silly with my excessive movements again.  I grabbed one of the books I’m reading and read for about an hour or so.  Then I fell asleep.  I have to start doing that every night from now on.  Reading a good book quiets my whirling mind and stills my nervous body.  Allows sleeping.Books in library

Note to self.  Read at night before trying to sleep.  Do not stuff this note in my purse.

My purse weighs a ton now.  I have stuffed it with all sorts of stuff yet to be discovered.  Again.  Total chaos in my purse.  Man.  I really need to quit doing that.  I write ideas down on any piece of paper that proves to be handy in the moment.  Then I rip that paper, fold it and stuff it in my purse.  Then I end up with a purse full of ripped paper with scribbles I can barely understand.  And before anyone says get yourself a notebook to write in…I have a notebook in my purse.  It even has stuff written in it.  Still.  I manage to not have it handy a lot of the time.  That has to be the reason why I end up with a purse full of papers.  Gotta think more on this one.  I really need to get a handle on it because it is an old habit of mine that bugs me.

More room for paper!

More room for paper! (Photo credit: Scarygami)

I’ve tried carrying the recorder and using that.  I feel super silly doing it, so I don’t.  Ditch the recorder.

Hubby and son are talking about getting me an iPad for Mother’s Day.  Maybe if that happens I’ll finally stop using paper?

iPad 2 with Smart Cover running iMovie.

iPad 2 with Smart Cover running iMovie. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I also had forgotten how often I drink coffee.  And how delicious coffee is to me.   Awakens every pleasure path inside of me.  mmmmmmmm….yum yum yum

A Thermochromic mug. The cold mug displays the...

A Thermochromic mug. The cold mug displays the sleeping face white on black. When you pour in the hot coffee, the mug’s appearance quickly changes. Within a minute, the black mug has become completely white and the face will have awoken to greet you. What a way to start the day! (Photo credit: Wikipedia)












And candy.  Certain candy.  Jellybeans.  Mackintosh toffee.  mmmmmmm…yum yum yum

A pile of Gimball's Jelly Beans, similar in fl...

A pile of Gimball's Jelly Beans, similar in flavors to Jelly Belly. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This is self medicating at it’s finest I say.


4 responses

  1. I find the anti-rejection drugs continue to keep my immune system knocked down so I still get sick quite often with every cold/cough/flu that comes around. As for my mood, I’m not sure. I don’t know if it attributes to my being tiredand lack of energy often or not.

  2. Thank you jz:) And stillstrange, I know your kidney transplant meds are for life. I’m wondering if those types of meds alter your mood at all?

  3. I could not imagine having no medication. Of course, that will never happen again with me since I have had a kidney transplant.

  4. I hear more than I’d like to, especially from women that they aren’t used to getting compliments. Why do you think that is? Anyway, just wanted to say it was not an off handed comment. I really enjoy reading your thoughts on different subjects, in that unique way you present them 🙂

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