Fibro: Bitterness

Debilitating, chronic pain causes us to go through so many draining emotions. Those rides on the emotional roller coaster are quite exhausting, leaving little or no energy left to help cope with the reality of our situations.

Initially, we grieve what we’ve lost, our sense of selves, who we were and dreams of who we could have been.image

When those dreams fade away into nothingness, our lives look pretty damn bleak, and with good reason. Humans need hope to survive and thrive.

Anger can take over then, propelling us to fight against whatever is causing our pain. Once we realize there is no cure, no magic pill to make it all go away, we feel powerless.image

And with that feeling of powerlessness comes creeping along a great big dose of self-pity. Why me? What did I ever do to deserve this? Where are the answers to my problems? Who did this to me? How do I get revenge on the perpetrator of my misery?image

Getting stuck in this endless cycle of asking questions with no real answers creates fertile ground for bitterness.image

Anger feeds it, causing amazingly quick growth until nothing is left but bitterness. Then, your life will truly be nothing but an empty vessel, smelling sour and unfit for use.

It does not have to be that way. Oh sure, no one is deserving of an endless life of pain and misery. We did nothing to deserve the pain, so stop feeling like revenge will bring you satisfaction. It won’t, you know that. The abused child was innocent, the accident was just an accident of circumstance, the disease is what it is. Maybe anger is justified for a bit; after all, anger can be a propellant toward a solution.image

While there may be little relief for the pain, there is certainly a lot we can do to end the misery. If, in spite of our best efforts and the efforts of our friends and family, we find that bitterness continues to overshadow our lives, we would be better served by seeking professional therapy, or God, if you believe in that sort of thing.image

I’d go with therapy but some have had great success with religion. Whatever. The point is, do something other than run in the vicious circle chasing your tail. Obviously it’s not working. Time to deviate from that path and try something else, don’t you think?

Don’t bother to deny it, for that little bit of bitterness stems from the unfairness of it all. Not many people feel responsible for the chronic pain they suffer, so I am almost certain we all feel a twinge of the old bitterness off and on in our darkest moments. If we don’t feed it I am sure it can’t grow and take over our existence.

Dont you agree?


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